It’s been a good weekend at the LBC Minister’s wives conference. Karen Alexander-Doyel did a great job keynoting. Darlene shared a testimony, We did Anniversary to Remember and Messages. We’ve got to get some rest and then head to Winfield for tomorrow’s worship. I have tomorrow night off. So relieved things are going well right now. We are just about ready to show off the next CP Rant. Winding down the rear… Lots of driving ahead of me.
Movement 1
Small and deep from Ocean’s breeze
The beast and birds, grass and trees
God’s great creation- verse libre’
The divine grace, and soul commision
The lonesome wish for one decision
The burning of the wasteland
Sinks to shores of tumultuous consequence
And in the storms, slicing through the soul
Fear, love, wounds, doubt
Greed, truth, war, shout
Flesh, lies, wind, deep
Merge, wide, run, leap
And surging through the threshold
Of each
Safe throughout eternity.
Wondering, we stare into the dark
Ominous
Infinite tapestry of stars
We breathe deeply
We love and lose
We learn and choose
This is what makes the man
beyond an accidental clan.
Ours is the mystery
Finding the great one in three
Believing and striving
Wondering if we’re the one who’s hiding.
O God of revelation
O God who once did speak
Burning bush, hand on wall
War of Hur and Aaron’s arm
But mystery-incarnation
Author of the vast creation
a gentleness and calm release
He grew and kept
He bled and wept
Placed cloistered in a borrowed tomb
behind a stone and Roman seal
With Him the vanquished hopes
death cradled purpose jealously
He stood watch
The treasures of Christ’s import silent, trapped and forgotten
and then… In a moment the grand verdict was announced
Resurrection underscored the cross
Snatching victory from cruel loss
Still and sure rules of natural laws reversed
Alive he justified the cursed
Those Lost within the trap of sin
The vagabonds were welcomed in.
He lives and speaks
The redeeming voice is drowned
in the cacophony of constant sound
But if you listen
He will speak.
Movement 2
The aroma of alabaster
An unmistakable scent
Beauty and extravagance
An elemental composition of a woman
Surrendered, vanquished, undone
Reckless passion borne of pain
Wasted treasure endless gain
I, too, will waste my life
For the One who spits in mud
The rescuer amidst the flood
The friend who calls me from a tree
The ghostlike vision on the sea
The Prophet at the healing pools
Arms outstretched to bands of fools
The One who breathes life into bones
Who understands wearisome groans.
I need his love not sterile proof
That distances and stands aloof.
The thing he so desires in me
Is trusting what I cannot see
Dispatching demons vanity
Through squeals of pigs calamity
And still the grand design is true.
The God who renders all things new.
Yes, He will render all things new.
Movement 3
Everything born of adversity is hewn in opportunity
This primordial ballet of soul chrysalis
Set in motion the grand orbit of redemption.
His prophecy:
Few will come
The road is narrow
Author of the moon and sparrow
The Beauty of uncertainty
Vicarious fortitude of faith
Lilies are the adornment
Of brutal sun and driving rain
Courage borne in doubting rubble
Yet I struggle
I wonder
Formulas crumble
The Word of God labors through perfect storms
Headless giant
Harlot hero
Hungry mass
Balaam’s ass
Less about a set of rules
More of mercy for the fools
What is the hope for the world?
It is the Church
A building hewn from the heart of whoring dirges
Wandering,
Unfaithful
Captive and ungrateful
And still she is a bride of beauty
Still she is the one beloved
Still pursued with priceless passion.
The one that through the ages
Distorted graces
Wrecked lives with shame
Divided races
The bride that pierced the side of the groom
The bride that judged without restraint
The crimes of tyranny and hate
Scorching the earth with un-civilization.
Chasing lovers of pleasure and pieces of gold
While scorning the poor, seeking, driving,
feuding, striving to be significant before the grave
Keeping score, imploring, folly, enclave of lies.
Is a man more a man by trusting himself
Or is there peace for such a wretch?
Much of self- is more like rot
Movement 4
Jonah cries a screed in prayer
For three days and nights.
In the belly of the beast.
He was saved and he was devoured
Both happened.
The three Hebrews under the thumb of a king
Stood and refused
The furnace ignited
They fell and they were saved.
Both happened
The rattles of a dying man
A late Messiah at a desperate scene
The stench of death and
And Lazarus moves
He was dead and alive
Both happened
Stephen shouts the truth of grace
Pharisees of rage and hate
Pummeled by the stones of man
Horrid death and glory seen
Both happened.
From Joan of Arc’s pyre
To Bonhoeffer’s stand
From martyrs’ fire
Executioner’s hand
I was destroyed
And I was redeemed.
Hated and esteemed
Both happened.
Movement 5
Lord, teach me to pray.
Let my prayers be so immersed in love
That all I want is you!
I will waste my life for just a glimpse of you
Prayer must be romance
Its composition stained with tears
A courtship brief
Eternity is the festival redemption
And the prayers of the saints
Cascading through all generations
May I touch the robe of Jesus
May I hear the silent voice
May I trust the hand of Jesus
Prayer becomes my holy choice
Everything is waste and void
Everything futility
A chasing after winds obtuse
Mortal insecurity
But constant intercession
Saves heart and heals the soul
Disciples grand possession
Broken, wounded lives made whole
The pure and holy iconoclast of satan’s furtive plans
Our dark and ancient rival
The father of bitter strife and self worship.
Traveling to and fro
His mouth stuffed with accusation
With an urgent mission of damnatio
His hands brewed an ancient libation:
chaotic tumult, relentless oppression
He credits to his favor all terror and obsession.
Prowling through the scrapheap east of eden’s gate.
Minions; victims of lucifer’s mendacity
Cast down with everything that scorns grace
From magnificent and worshipful
To vengeful knaves
The keeper of doom
The digger of graves
But death, sin and disease
The reproach of all…
Lucifer falls to his knees
As all dastardly scrum fallen foes
The song of redemption sounds
To every star, hamlet, city and road
First, the song heard only be those who
Listen
But as day turns to day
The sound grows
It baffles the skeptics.
The music brings sweetness to the faithful
And remorse to the cynics
It is victorious, unflappable, unstoppable and loud.
The song is heard from the east
The rising sun heralds the new day
This perpetual day of grace
Will soon crush the dark desolation
And the schemes of fallen angels.
No longer will men strive against men
Or chains repress the weak
No longer will disease and death
Attack the least of these.
Orphans, unborn innocents
Those on distant shores repressed
Will soon hear the ever growing anthem of redemption.
Amen, amen, amen!
Fine’
And here is the name that binds men’s souls to grace
It shelters, protects, and resurrects Kingdom and soul
O to Jesus I bow my knee
O to Jesus I live and breathe
O to Jesus I stand in faith
O to Jesus All is won
O to Jesus I run the race
Business meeting was tonight and I had some amazing crawfish étouffée at the church. I dropped off some Wendy’s to Mom and Dad.
Today we received some hard news on Jon’s cancer. It seems to have progressed to his jawbone. Praying for a miracle.
Darlene is coming in tomorrow night and I’m taking Friday of. We’ll spend the next three nights at Tall Timbers. We’ll do the minister’s wives conference Friday night and Saturday. The rest of the time we’ll just relax.
If I have the words and appearance of an angelic messenger and have supernatural gifts, but neglect love, I am like a blaring, off- key trombone and clanging cymbals at 6:00 a.m. And if I have a gift for solutions and meanings, and though I have faith that could make stuck things move and heavy things light, and have not love, I’m an obvious zero in the Kingdom. And if I give everything I own to charities and die on the battlefield of creeds and principles, and have not love, it means absolutely nothing in the end. Love is willing to put up with a lot of injustice. It smiles when frowns are in order; it goes against the flow of hatred by being kind. It doesn’t look at others and say, Why not me, God? Love does not boast; it doesn’t thrust its credentials to the front. It’s not stuck up. It doesn’t fly off the handle. Love isn’t self-serving. It doesn’t answer to the bell of heavyweight bouts. Evil? It doesn’t even go there. It doesn’t find gratification in revenge or smutty living. Instead, it is turned on by truth and justice. Love carries all things, has faith in God’s will, has hope in dark valleys. It puts up with a whole lot of junk. Love is undefeated. Sooner or later, the prophecies will be over, the tongues will be silent, the knowledge will be unnecessary, and it will dematerialize. Right now we’ve got a glimpse, a very small glimpse, of the overall landscape of eternity, and we preach what we know. When we see our lives on this earth, we are going to see it all face-to-face and in living color. But this one thing will be the same after we see it all: three things won’t move an inch. There will be faith, hope and love.
These three. But the greatest of these is love.
This has been my work for about 2 hours tonight. Getting ready to shut down an old blog. tullos.org. Lots of memories and thoughts about life so far. When I reflected on how life was back about ten years ago I am reminded about how constantly I was weary as a Dad, Pastor, Editor, commuter, husband, worshiper…. Life is calmer these days even though I have three jobs right now. I whispered my repentance for the days I chose busy-ness over fellowship with Jesus.
Blessed are those that admit the truth. They know that they live in abject spiritual poverty outside the grace of God.
Blessed are those who see God as Holy and mourn because they realize that they are never better than anyone because righteousness is found only through Christ. Abba Father will comfort them.
Blessed is the person that doesn’t need to promote their power to feel important. They let God do all the heavy lifting and the earth is theirs as an inheritance.
Blessed are the ones that crave to be like Jesus and are sickened by their rebellious nature. God will fill them up with righteousness.
Blessed are the ones that don’t understand the law of pay-back but revel in the practice of forgiveness and reconciliation. God will settle the score and forgive their debts.
Blessed are the ones that have trained themselves to think the best of people and look only to the good. They are focusing on God’s view and they will ultimately see God.
Blessed are those that do their best creative work in making peace. Those people are God’s and God’s alone. He’s the Father, Prince, and inventer of peace.
Blessed are the people who pay the ultimate price in this temporary life because God saves the best for all eternity.
We live our lives as testimony to the Living God. Everything we do if in full display to God.
Our best testimony is found in our reactions. Do we trust the God who preserved the early church.
verse 24: who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness—by whose stripes you were healed.
For motivation for living the Jesus way, we need only to look at the cross.
When seized by temptation- look to the cross.
When angered by the words of enemies- look to the cross
When bearing the pain of illness and weakness- look to the cross.
Lord, brand me with your great sign of grace.
Hope and mercy shine through the threshold of love everlasting
The eyes of ever born grace
Just a touch
As she crawls through the mass of shuffling feet
and the cacophony of voices.
Eternity kisses the distance
between normal and divine.
Speaks the woman:
I have heard of you.
I don’t ask for your embrace
and yet this act is selfish
(I believe)
I long to stretch toward the hem
of Almighty Wonderous Cross-bound God.
And now another one is reaching through the crowd on hands and knees…
Another spiritual beggar-
The one who writes these words.
Whenever you find tears in your eyes, especially unexpected tears, ¨it is well to pay the closest attention. They are not only telling the secret ¨of who you are, but more often than not of the mystery of where you have come from and are summoning you to where you should go next. ~Frederick Buechner
Learn this lesson: not to trust Christ because you repent, but trust Christ to make you repent; not to come to Christ because you have a broken heart, but to come to Him that He may give you a broken heart; not to come to Him because you are fit to come, but to come to Him because you are unfit to come. Your fitness is your unfitness. Your qualification is your lack of qualification. ~C.H. Spurgeon
The church is not a select circle of the immaculate, but a home where the outcast may come in. It is not a palace with gate attendants and challenging sentinels along the entrance-ways holding off at arm’s-length the stranger, but rather a hospital where the broken-hearted may be healed, and where all the weary and troubled may find rest and take counsel together.~ James H. Aughley
We want to avoid suffering, death, sin, ashes. But we live in a world crushed and broken and torn, a world God Himself visited to redeem. We receive his poured-out life, and being allowed the high privilege of suffering with Him, may then pour ourselves out for others. ~ Elizabeth Elliott
“A broken soul is not the absence of beauty, but a cracked and torn soul reeks of the sweet incense it contains.”
Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days – when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when your out of options, when the pain is great – and you turn to God alone.~ Rick Warren
God uses broken things. It takes broken soil to produce a crop, broken clouds to give rain, broken grain to give bread, broken bread to give strength. It is the broken alabaster box that gives forth perfume. It is Peter, weeping bitterly, who returns to greater power than ever. ~Vance Havner
God is looking for broken men who have judged themselves in the light of the cross of Christ. When He wants anything done, He takes up men who have come to the end of themselves, whose confidence is not in themselves, but in God. ~ Harry Ironside
Like the rock that was smitten, we too need to be broken, before the rivers of blessing can flow out through us to others. The opposition of men and their false accusations serve to keep us broken before God.~ Zach Poonen
God is not looking for the powerful and the successful and those who are able communicators. Instead, He looks for the person who has a broken and contrite spirit. Those individuals, whether they are extroverted or introverted, humorous or melancholy, are regularly in the quiet place bowing before God’s Word with a trembling heart and seeking fresh enabling from the Holy Spirit. They have been brought to see that they did not make themselves, nor did they save themselves. They are totally dependent upon God’s grace (Isa. 66:2). ~Alistair Bedd
Excerpt From: “Untitled 3.” iBooks.