You can measure one’s faith by their ability to move on. Jesus encountered many people who fawned and queried Him, looking to work out some kind of bargain, complete with caveats and clauses. He presents each follower with a moment. These moments connect us to a point of decision. When that moment comes, you’d better grab it because it’s singular in transcendence.It transports you into both adventure and holy consequence. In Luke 9, we see three symbolic responses to the Jesus call. Each representing different ways

During times of hardships

The first declaring voice makes an enormous claim. The would-be follower meets Jesus on the road and says, “I will follow you wherever you go.” Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”

So often I have longed for a 10 year plan. I’ve dreamed of putting down roots and knowing exactly where I will find myself at the end of every day. I hate surprises and Uncle Murphy who shows up when everything that can go wrong does. He enters the arena of my personal world in force and fanfare. I don’t like it. I hate it. I hate surprises. And I HATE MOVING BOXES. What will happen next? Only God knows and He won’t tell. Sometimes life is void of parachutes, exit plans, and emergency funds. Sometimes we exit the scene of the fire, smelling like soot and hopping in the car of a loved one with little explanation, because life is just that unpredictable. Don’t feel abandoned because you lack the certainty of addresses and schedules. He’s there. He’s just silent.

When we anticipate grief

Some of us see grief just around the corner instead of 10 years down the road. We catastrophize tomorrow and we say like Jesus’ next potential follower, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.” The context is probably not a hospice situation. Burying your father in that culture is committing to be there to the very end for your earthly community. This person’s father could have been in perfect health and 40 years old. Jesus’ response would seem terse and unsympathetic if the dad was presently at death’s door but probably that was not the case. Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.”

We love to be tidy, even obligatory in life. But with Jesus, we don’t loiter in the obituaries of our mind. We hug their necks, bid farewell and trust God. No one has funerals on their calendar months in advance. Life goes on and Jesus calls us into life which, at its core, can’t be tethered to future sackcloths.

When we have to leave home

Still another said, “I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.” Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”

Sometimes our exits are protracted. We don’t know how to hang up the phone or walk out the door. We do postmortems where we look at our past and wonder if we could have left later. We burden ourselves with feeling of guilt for not being with the same people in the same town, facing the same problems. We have to stop rubbernecking our history and move forward. Sometimes you have to cry the tears, hug the necks, and pack it in- all on the same day. We don’t have time to worry about what will happen in our wake.

There has never been a time when I left a ministry, job or town that everything suddenly fell apart because I left. I can’t think that much of me. None of us are indispensable. You’ll be missed but the people you have to leave will be fine. Don’t idolize your importance to an organization or a community. To do so limits your perspective on the sovereignty of God.

So when you are faced with a sad, yet mandatory farewell and you find your beloved friends questioning, speculating and bargaining regarding your departure, here’s a good response: “I love you. I must be going.”

Our trust in God’s plan should be:

• Unconditional

• Unwavering

• Undaunted

• Undeniable

• Unadulterated

It means giving God a blank check.

I’ve asked myself this question for years now and I still see through a glass darkly. I am guided and shaped in the midst of my own perplexities. One fact counters the next, but this list is true. Everything else is still on the table.

I am loved by Christ . . .
often wrong
rarely strong
seduced by grace
fixed in place
soaked in tears
racked in fears
a mix of duality
I long for centrality
homesick
heaven bent
wounded, limping
yet surprisingly steady and quite unrelenting
rebel some days
deceived by the haze
this maddening, saddening, dazzling maze.
sick and then healed
with mercy revealed
faithful, bold, and perfectly formed
wandering, timid, disfigured and scorned
enigma, riddle, mystery, clue
firm, unchanging, promised, and true.

About a month ago I took a swing at the diet phenomenon of intermittent fasting. If you’re not familiar with it, it’s the practice of going 16 hours without eating anything. I’d start at around 9 pm and eat precisely 1 pm. It works, but the people who know me best have encouraged me to give it up. I’ve lost weight but it’s best not to interact with me around noon. My personality changes and I say things that are just plain out of character and none of them nice. My hangryness kicks in. I have little patience for anything or anyone. They would much prefer the slightly overweight, jolly, patient, kind person that I am on a full stomach than the skinny, twitchy, crass, impatient, grumpy guy that watches the clock like an astronaut, waiting to blast off toward any loaded platter of complex carbohydrates at 1PM. I have come to the sober realization that I am a broken man with an incredible aptitude for pizza. 

12:30 PM is about the time when coworkers scatter to distant cubicals and watercoolers far from my workstation.  Yes, they know. I try to avoid making any important decisions from noon to 1pm. Decision making on an empty stomach is dangerous. Just ask Esau. I think he invented intermittent fasting and paid a high price for it. After a morning of hunting on an empty stomach he caught the scent of Jacob’s stew and he made a stupid decision: 

He said to Jacob, “Let me eat some of that red stuff, because I’m exhausted.” That is why he was also named Edom. (Genesis 25:30 CSB). 

It doesn’t sound he knew what the dish was!  “Give that uh…. RED STUFF!” And on top of that, he got a nickname: Edom, meaning “red.”  When you get a nickname for something you ate, it’s always bad.  If I were Esau, the scripture might have read: “’I’m starving! Let me have some of those crunchy things!’ That is why they called him, ‘Doritos’.”

It’s just not safe for me to continue intermittent fasting. I’ll stick to fasting for spiritual growth, not weight loss. It’s just not worth it. Appetites are a part of life but just think of all the people who made bad choices because they let their appetites get the best of them. Take it from a recovering sinner, when you’re hungry for food, power, sex, or notoriety, you tend to make stupid choices. You might even sell your birthright. 

60 years

most of them (I would claim) lagniappe

something extra, but never promised.

I could have found my resting place in 1983

as a log truck (sans lights),

barreled down Hwy 165 in North Louisiana.

I pulled onto the road, and for some odd reason on a moonless night,

I hit the brakes as the phantom monster barreled two feet from the fender

A 2 AM miracle as glorious as the parting of waters outside the corporation limits of Egypt.

Later on, it was the guy line of a telephone pole that snared the bushhog.

Rising high like a killer whale breaching the surface on the water.

Gravity ensued, slamming the engine block to the ground inches from my head as a lay on the ground.

These are just two of many instances that I have slipped through the crooks and crannies between life and death.

In other words, I have played with house-money for years.

(Or so it would seem)

but I contend that I have had a guiding unseen Hand, be it angelic intervention, supernatural consequence, or dumb luck. Although I doubt the latter.

No one could ever be that lucky so often.

But even more so I have been drawn into grace and every sudden rescue reminds me that Jesus is Sustainer, and the degree of difficulty has been mighty high in sustaining me. And I am mercifully still alive after 60 years.

I have lived in the company of saints.

I was raised by two glorious, creative, passionate, flawed saints, Mark and Lillie Tullos. I still dwell under the shadow of their faith. Dad was a force of nature. He was bold. Total extravert. A musical savant. Play a line of music and he could replicate it, without looking at a note. He never met a stranger especially at Walmart. And mom never stopped pressing me. And that’s a good thing. She wasn’t a touchy-feely mom but touch me and you’d feel the force of a thousand Samurai warriors.

My favorite storyteller and theologian is my older sister, Melodye. She is a second mom.

My favorite artist is my brother, Mark. I’ve never met someone so creative and yet so entrepreneurial. He’s built a handful of museums and I’m convinced his paintings will reside in many more after he leaves the planet.’

And the most encouraging, in-my-corner, got your-back-little sister on earth is mine. Her name is Melinda.

I am the one in the family, most uncomfortable in my own skin, often dreaming, rarely sure of myself but still on the hunt for the Great Divine. I am still the little one, dreams are my minions along with a few drunken stragglers I call obsessions.

I have had other guardians. Including:

Obed and Linda Kirkpatrick, Phillip Willis, Dennis Phelps, Benjamin Harlan, Ed and Patsy Sutton, Debi Morris and Eugene Morris, Frank David Bennet, George Clark, Marjorie Radcliffe, Jean Woodye, Vivian Bush, Brooks Faulkner, Henry Webb, Ed and Patsy Sutton, Larry and Jan Payne—and too many more to remember but these are some of the ones I thanked God for yesterday.

I have heroes that shaped my journey Welby Boseman, Ron Brown, John Kyle, Randy Davis, Dennis Parrish, Jimmy Draper, Bill Choate (The guy I want to be like)

Jonathans arrived in every city, job and chapter of my life,

Justin Bufkin (Master Cinematographer), Roger Craig (Savant), Chris Johnson (My yoda), GB Howell (my reality check), Tim Shamburger (My oldest friend…47 Years!) Chris Turner (My Mars Hill companion), Derick Pindroh (My moving buddy), Jeff Wash (My West Texas kindred spirit) and Gavin Stevens (It’s in the movie) Roc Collin (Preach)

This is all stream of consciousness and I’m missing about half of my Jonathans on this post. And I pray I’ve been a Jonathan to others.

A glorious, beautiful collection of guttersnipe brothers called TAK.

I’m also thankful for Elavil. I have taken this one med for 30 years and the one time I tried to taper I ended up in the psychiatric hospital. So every night I say grace, a word of thanks for this old fashioned antidepressant and take the pill.

I share secrets, some kept well and others less cloistered. Steve Holt is the custodian of most these days. He knows where my “jacked up jars” are buried. He knows enough to write a hit piece on me but he has mercifully resisted.

I was blessed with an additional sister, Johanna Leonard. Still to this day, I don’t think she really knows how much confidence she poured into my life in high school. She typed my first play that I wrote by hand and counseled me when my faith hit the rocks of the storm-tossed sea of doubt.

In 2006, I conducted the funeral of my best friend, Danny Dean. In one day, a thousand memories and shared dreams were transported to the unknown country. I didn’t really cry until I drove from the graveside and then I wept for days. There are days when I can’t see his face and it’s in those times that I look at his son’s profile picture and it’s as clear as day. Danny had the force of personality and vision I both admired and coveted. Brutally honest. Fiercely loyal. Everyone knew Danny and I were inseparable, but he took the lead. When left ,(in Frostian terms) I became closely acquainted with the night.

In the building I work, three godly women keep me in line on our corner of the building, Sharlyn, Cynthia, and Tammy. They put up with a lot of disorganization and video editing noise, and they’ve saved me a lot of embarrassment over the past five years.

And of course there is Darlene Tullos

She’s my girl. Darlene has taught me so much about life and I am so glad we didn’t give up on each other during difficult times. She’s helped me find keys, wallets and rental trucks. The beauty married a dyslexic ragamuffin. Her compassion is unfathomable. I’m inspired by her heaven-and-earth moving faith. She and the guys have put up with my inability to say no, my codependency, and the crooked paths we traveled. Never have two more different people married but as the great mystic philosopher Rocky Balboa once said, “She’s got gaps, I’ve got gaps, together we fill gaps.” We are still enjoying the journey. I know the best is yet to come.

God blessed me with four men, Isaac, Jacob, Nathan and Caleb. They are my prizes in my old age. Each one, teaching me so much and giving me reasons to live if only to see what happens next. They are masterpieces with a fierceness of love so great that it overwhelms me.

As I say often:

I am constantly amazed by the faithful love of Jesus.

And as I reflect on the life I’ve lived here, mostly fearful of everything, I realize that I never,

**EVER**

had anything to fear. He has been and always will be, relentlessly faithful, continuously sufficient, and absolutely available. I am still captivated by this lowly carpenter and faithful redeemer- I’m still struggling awkwardly to construct the right syntax and composition of words to describe the One who is truly indescribable. I will continue to try until the book is closed and my time comes.

King Jesus, your presence is palpable, your depth is dependable and your grace undeniable.

 

In 1996, when I was an editor at LifeWay, I spent a handful of days in the hospital. It was a difficult. I’d never spent a night in the hospital and we had four young boys. Needless to say, my wife was up to her ears in kid’s stuff and I hated that I was stuck in a place I didn’t want to be. Breaking out of a downtown facility in a hospital gown was out of the question. I’m an overly bashful sort. At about 9 PM, after I had read every bit a literature available in my room, I heard a familiar voice. It was George Clark (picture below), a pastor, fellow editor, and mentor at LifeWay. Besides the Mrs., He was my only visitor that week. Nobody from my church came to the hospital, but George was there. It was during that time that I really appreciated the power of servanthood and character. George went to be with the Lord a few years ago. I don’t remember a whole lot about that experience, but I can still see George walking through the door, and I can still hear his deep voice and his unmistakable Tennessee accent as he prayed for me. Those are the things I will remember until the day I see him again in Heaven. He showed me what the character of a man looks like. 

The following characteristics were personified in George’s life and work. I think he’d agree with this list.

Be a man of honesty. 
A man should personify honesty in all his relationships. We ought to strive to be honest which is harder than it sounds. Sometimes it’s hard to speak the truth while fudging with the truth seems easier. Truth-telling is the bedrock of character. It would have been so much easier for Stephen, one of the first seven deacons, to slowly back away from the truth when he saw the religious leaders holding rocks and daring him to continue to speak. He was the first of many believers to lose his life for the truth of the Gospel. 

“If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don’t have integrity, nothing else matters.” Alan K. Simpson

Be a man of sexual integrity. 
Recently, we’ve witnessed how fast and how far men can fall when they lose their way sexually. No man sets out to wreck his life over a fleeting pleasure but it happens gradually, sometimes innocently and later the damage is visible. That’s why guardrails are so important. The culture has changed dramatically in realm of sexual conduct in our culture but the Christian standard remains. We have to be diligent and guard our hearts. We see the story over and over again. It starts out with a conversation. Then a sharing of feeling and emotions that should not be shared with a woman who is not your spouse. Then the gravitational pull of sin continues to slowly wear down the boundaries until the only thing left is a mess that two or more families will have to survive and a church that has to ask what to do next. 

Be a man of generosity.  If you want to see the true character of a man, look at his bank account. Materialism is at an all-time high and generosity is at an all time low. Most economists say that todays families give less of a percentage of their income to the church and other charitable organizations than the families in the Great Depression. I really don’t understand it; but I don’t think I’ve ever met a person that has “giver’s remorse” after they gave generously to the Lord. Why? Giving makes us happy. In 2017, HealthDay News reported after research that “generosity really is its own reward, with the brain seemingly hardwired for happiness in response to giving.”^[1]

Be a man of optimism. Optimism seems like a personality trait than an aspect of character, but I would argue that optimism is primary to the health and viability of a church. It speaks louder than the eloquence of your preacher, the aesthetics of your facility, or the talent of your musicians. If the leadership is optimistic, the church culture will change. You certainly remember the twelve spies that went to get a preview of the Promised Land. What were their names? Think hard!  I’ll bet you remember only two- Joshua and Caleb. They’re the ones people name their kids after! No one names their son, Shamua or Palti or any of the other names on the spy roster. Why? All spies, except Joshua and Caleb, were frightened, pessimistic and forgettable in the long run. We must be optimistic. We’ve all read the back of the book. We all know how the whole thing ends. Jesus is on the throne. Satan is defeated. We win! And if we’re optimistic about the big picture, we can be optimistic that God can work with our faith. 

Be a man of humility. Harry Truman said it best, “It’s amazing what you can accomplish if you don’t care who gets the credit.” I’ve known lots of men who seek power and prestige at church because they didn’t get it at work. This is contrary to everything the church is about. Being a man isn’t about grasping for power. In fact, a committed follower of Christ is about the exact opposite. We go about our business with a spiritual basin and towel, just like Jesus.  Once you are a man of humility, there’s no telling what you will accomplish. 

This is what I know about being a man of character. If George was around, I’d call him to improve this list. His short list would be better. He lived it every day. 

---

^[1] https://www.webmd.com/balance/news/20170815/givers-really-are-happier-than-takers#1

One of the great blessings in my marriage is this:  My wife knows how to mingle. I just tag along.  I’m not much a talker. As much as I’ve prayed for it, the Holy Spirit never anointed me with the gift of mingling. Perhaps something happened in my childhood or maybe it was that rule that I took too seriously:  Don’t talk to strangers. Darlene has never obeyed that rule and I couldn’t be happier. At dinner parties or church fellowships, I’m happy to just smile, nod and let her practice her gift of conversation. She even successfully invited a salesman to visit our church when we attended his timeshare pitch.  We didn’t even have to buy a condo and he showed up at our church the following Sunday. She’s talked her way out of my speeding tickets. 3 times! She turns on the tears and shares the reason I was speeding and the next thing I know we are given the tip of the hat and we’re back on the road. I’ve never talked my way out anything. She’s a pro. 

I hate haircuts, and not because I long for a man-bun or to look like a member of Led Zeppelin. No. I hate it because I have to make a short list of things I to say to the gal who cuts my hair. After two or three universal topics like the weather, what I do for a living, who I am, I usually create about 10 minutes of awkward silence. I tip a little more than most because who can put a price tag on awkwardness. 

My dad was a total extravert. He could and would talk to anybody. I remember days as a child watching him figure out a way to talk to everybody. He’d start with a joke. He’d have about ten in his holster. And then he  would try to figure out if he was related to the stranger. I learned at a very young age that, in fact, we are somehow related to everyone in town. Even an exchange student from Japan. 

For me, the polarities are striking. I don’t have any trouble getting up and speaking at conferences or church services. No problem there… It’s a controlled environment. I plan what I’m going to say and no one talks back.  At least not often. They stay in their seats and I stay on the platform. No problem. After it’s over, it gets strange though. My impulse when I speak to people after the meeting is to begin a long screed of apologies. 

“Sorry it took so long.” 

“I hope you could hear me.”

“I don’t think I said it the way I want to say it.” 

As parents and grandparents, we have to talk. The generations behind us need our words about the important things like defensive driving, the importance of a daily quiet time and the complete absurdity of the American League designated hitter. I think I do well at these talks especially about salvation and walking daily with Jesus. The difficult conversations about human sexuality are the ones I dread. I never felt qualified. I’d take my kids on a special trip and along the drive, I’d spill the beans on how everything works. For me, the strategy was perfect because I could keep my eyes of the road while I’m talking.

These days I am willing to embrace my introversion while seeking to be more daring in my interactions. In fact, yesterday, I even talked to the parking officer who happened to be placing a citation under my windshield wiper for parking in a no-parking zone.  We had a wonderful  conversation about our kids, the growth in our city, the power of random acts of kindness. We must have talked for 15 minutes. But he still gave me the parking ticket. 

In Tennessee Williams play, “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof,” we encounter the alcoholic anti-hero, Brick Pollitt. Brick was once a football hero with the world at his feet. But in the play, we see him as an broken man who hopelessly lost his way. His liquor provided the only peace from the noise and tumult of life. He describes it as a click that would come after he gets enough drink to settle his nerves. Throughout most of the story, he is simply waiting for “the click” and that momentary ephemeral peace he craves. It seems that there are so many men, who decide life’s not possible without some kind of click, whether it’s through entertainment, sex, beer, or sports. It’s all about numbing the pain and satisfying the constant craving of their soul. 

Brick is an archetype of spiritual despair. He’s long since left the hunt for meaning and entered into a state of moral paralysis. He’s mourning the death of a close friend and struggling with the guilt of his own existence. His marriage is lifeless. Everything is circling into a pit of meaninglessness.

No purpose, no passion, no peace… But still a thirst, an unquenchable thirst.

The Samaritan woman Jesus encountered, had the same issue 2000 years earlier. She asked Jesus where she could find this water that could quench the thirst of her soul. She had been on an arduous quest through several marriages and gods. And now the one true God of the universe stared her down and offered her something far greater than a click of peace. He offered her a fountain of living water. We constantly encounter men and women who are going through their day, navigating through life from one click to the next, searching for peace. Jesus went out of his way to offer a soul searcher a fountain of peace that proved far greater than a momentary click. And now Jesus invites us to share this living water also. 

Isn’t it inspiring when we see Forrest Gump running through the battlefield as bombs explode carrying his pal Bubba? We have to smile when we hear those simple, loving words, “Bubba was my best good friend, and even I know that ain’t just something you can find around the corner.” It’s true. Good best friends are rare.

God surprised David by revealing that his best friend was to be the son of his greatest rival, King Saul. (Read 1 Samuel 18:1-3.)

1. Choose your friends wisely.

Perhaps one of the most important decisions we make is who we choose to do life with. Friendship and connections will determine our destiny, shape our future and direct our steps.

“Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company corrupts good morals’” (1 Cor. 15:33).

“A contrary man spreads conflict, and a gossip separates close friends” (Prov. 16:28).

“Don’t make friends with an angry man, and don’t be a companion of a hot-tempered man, or you will learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare” (Prov. 22:24-25).

2. Forgive your friends willingly.

“Therefore, God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, accepting one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive. Above all, put on love—the perfect bond of unity” (Col. 3:12-14).

If we are not reconciled, Jesus reminds us that we can’t experience real worship. Worship is always preceded by reconciliation and forgiveness. Otherwise it’s just religion.

“Nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore, we must be saved by hope. Nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history; therefore we must be saved by faith. Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore, we are saved by love. No virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own viewpoint; therefore we must be saved by the final form of love which is forgiveness.” —Reinhold Niebuhr

3. Listen to your friends closely.

Our real friends aren’t the ones who simply flatter us and make us feel comfortable with ourselves. The true friend loves us enough to speak truth to us. If we want to grow we must learn this art of speaking and listening to truth.

“Without guidance, people fall, but with many counselors there is deliverance” (Prov. 11:14).

“Better an open reprimand than concealed love. The wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive” (Prov. 27:5-6).

4. Defend your friends fiercely.

Are you willing to defend your friends when they experience adversity? Solomon describes this type of relationship this way in Ecclesiastes:

“Two are better than one because they have a good reward for

their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up;

but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up. Also,

if two lie down together, they can keep warm; but how can one

person alone keep warm?” (Ecc. 4:9-11).

5. Love your friends sacrificially.

“This is My command: Love one another as I have loved you” (John 15:12-15).

A surprising friend is one that will lay down his or her life for you.

A surprising friend is a friend that loves with a God-kind-of-love!

The moment you began your relationship with Jesus Christ you also began a relationship with other Christians. Now you are part of God’s family, and in God’s family there are no orphans. God did not intend for His children to live as individual islands of faith, but rather as a community of believers, interrelated with each other and part of something much bigger than themselves. That “something” is the Church.

6. Know the greatest friend eternally.

“A man with many friends may be harmed, but there is a friend who stays closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24).

To experience a love that crosses all boundaries of race, opinion, and fear

To be a friend is to know the Friend.

To understand a love that crushes the hard shell of bitterness

To know love in all its aspects

This is to be a friend.

To ignore

To know the need and never take a stand

This is the way of isolation.

His voice beckons us to share this love

It’s a sacrifice far and above.

Higher than any mountain

More refreshing than any other fountain

This is the heart of the God.

It’s what we choose to applaud

It’s what we celebrate today

Precious, more than words can say

And the more we seek His grace

The more hurt we are willing to face.

To be the kind of friend that goes the extra mile

To see the pleasure of His smile

This is what it really looks like to be a friend

A servant faithful to the end.

To seek Him

To find Him

To serve Him

To love Him

To please Him

To be His friend . . .

5 Traits of a Humble Leader

I don’t know about you, but I can’t wrap my brain around the task Moses faced. Can you imagine the pressure of being a leader and provider for thousands of people in the wilderness? And these weren’t perfect followers by any stretch. 

You can just imagine the voicemails and texts he would get before 6 AM, if there were voicemails back then.

And to top it all off, his own family took offense to his wife’s nationality and let everybody know about it. But Moses, according to Numbers 12:3, was a very humble man. The Lord took care of the situation without a word from Moses and after they received God’s leprous punishment, Moses even prayed for their healing. Evidently, Moses had the Lord’s attention, and I would argue that God came to his defense precisely because of his humility. Ultimately, Moses’ humility led to unity among God’s chosen people.

“That pillar of fire at night is scaring our camel! And that cloud during the day is affecting my asthma.”

Humility is the secret sauce of every long-term leader. The Hogan Assessment Firm, a secular research group, offered a summary of their work in studying humble leaders: 

Organizations often overlook humble employees for leadership positions in favor of those who are charismatic. Charismatic people are charming and inspirational, but many turn out to be narcissistic, arrogant, and potentially exploitative. In contrast, humble leaders empower followers and promote team learning.^[1]

1. A humble leader is teachable.

The worst thing that could happen to a servant leader is for him to believe that he has arrived. A humble leader is self-aware. He’s aware that every circumstance and relationship is an opportunity to learn. Think about it. We are unique, which implies that there are skills, perspectives and lessons that are found in every relationship. The humble leader would say, “There are some things I can only learn from you.” With this as a mindset, every relationship, even the difficult ones, are treasured. Every challenge, trial and circumstance provides an opportunity for growth. Jerry, a deacon in our church recently was diagnosed with colon cancer. In the first five minutes of our initial conversation, he said something that I’ll never forget. “You know, Matt, it’s difficult, but I’m sure learning a lot of things through all of this. It’s really amazing!” Frankly I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. It wasn’t a posture of self-pity or pessimism, although he had every right to go there. It was almost like a simple prayer of “What’s next, Father?” A Christ-follower approaches life as a lifelong learner who is rehearsing his walk with Christ as a prelude to eternity. 

• A humble leader quickly realizes and admits mistakes.

Perhaps the most impactful moment for the season leader to seize is the opportunity to say to his peers and mentees, “I made a mistake.” Or “I need a do-over.”  Nothing great is ever learned when leader casts blame on others or seeks to cover up a personal mistake or a sin. The only way a team grows through a failure is when amends are offered, and mistakes are owned. Your ability to be humble means you are not only willing to recognize your shortcomings but also being able to laugh at yourself even now and then. Create a “James 5:16 moment.” Joyfully confess your faults one to another! It will get your mind right. It might even heal you. 

• A humble leader celebrates other leaders and is quick to give credit. 

The flipside of admitting our mistakes is sharing the credit. In the church, credit is infinitely divisible. We are all part of the same body. As President Truman and Coach Wooden often said, “It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.”  As humble leaders we need to look for opportunities to recognize the successes and victories in our church. This is a far greater motivator than constant corrections and tweaks. Some men have to get over the inherent fallacy that if you affirm people, they won’t be hungry or motivated. Positive motivation always works best. It’s like the old parenting proverb, “Catch your kids doing something good.” A narcissist sees credit given to a colleague as a lowering of their own personal esteem through comparison. Envy prevents gratefulness and joy, but the humble leader celebrates others, and he is rewarded. 

• A humble leader admits his limitations.

Have you ever considered that a heavy workload and a life with no margin could be a hidden symptom of pride? It often connotes a man who is unwilling to delegate or ask for help because he believes that only he could do it right. The humble leader realizes that he’s not the resident superman. He burned that cape a long time ago. Don’t just give help. Learn to ask for help. As Larry Eisenburg put it: “For peace of mind, we need to resign as general manager of the universe.”

• A humble leader realizes that he is only vessel, not the main character. 

We are often tempted in assuming the story is all about us, but of course it isn’t. We must get beyond ourselves and get the 30,000-foot view of all that is going on. We are all a part of a much bigger story than any of us can comprehend. I might not have a starring role, but I have a few lines to say. I commit to saying those few lines as best I can. You and I might not change a nation but we all can help change a child’s life. Imagine what would happen if everyone led humbly. It really would change a nation!

Humility is a gift, but it is also a skill. It won’t be accomplished overnight. We must daily pick up our cross. We must work on it daily. Jesus provides the template: “He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death— even to death on a cross.” When we focus on Jesus, it’s not hard to be humble.

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^[1] https://www.hoganassessments.com/research/ongoing-innovations/humility-2/

As I read the Gospel, there’s something that stands out in so many narratives and backstories. Jesus loves desperate people. Whether it’s the pleading father, the paralyzed man whose friends tore the roof off a house, or the sufferings of the entire nation of Israel, desperate people always get His attention.

I can remember times when I was so preoccupied with my work, the game, or a task, that my five-year-old son would grab my face with both his hands to assure I was listening. That’s just how absurdly one-track minded I can get. But that was never the case with Jesus. Nobody had to grab Him by the face. The moment the tassels of his prayer garment were touched, He felt her faith connect with His sufficiency. There is absolute power in the faith of a desperate person.

I’ve spent lots of time trying not to appear desperate, while knowing the deep chasm of my own insufficiency. And there is power in desperation. It’s clumsy at times. When I’m desperate, there’s no telling what might come out of my mouth. My prayers are fragmented. Sometimes all I can pray is the oldest one: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God have mercy on me.” In fact, that’s how I start every morning. It centers me on the truth that I have to cry out for mercy. Every morning. Every evening. And a baker’s dozen times a day. “Lord Jesus, Son of God have mercy.” I’m sure there are those who don’t need his mercy as much as I do, but it’s my broken bread and butter.

It brings me back to the woman reaching for the tassels of Jesus. (Luke 8, Mark 5)

A desperate, sick, bankrupt woman fights her way through the crowd to touch Jesus’ cloak. In Mark, we read that she spent everything she had on doctors but things only got worse. I have been there. It’s when you throw money at a problem and the problem’s appetite for money only grows. No one wants “money pit” problems. They’ll bring you to the end of yourself. Who wants that? There comes a time when you aren’t worried about how humiliating you look. You just lay yourself out there in front of God and everybody because you don’t care what anybody thinks. “In front of” is none of your concern.

As soon as she made contact with Him, He knew it and focused all his attention on her. In one moment, we can agree on a number of things about Jesus. He’s never too late, He’s never too busy, and He’s never too burdened to step into the pain of our desperation. Sometimes, He has to bring us into desperation in order for us to diligently seek Him. That’s the whole point of this life and yet we are often too consumed with the crowd to really stop and focus on our ultimate and preeminent King. That’s too bad, because when it comes down to it, every solution for brokenness, our pain and neediness is no more than a touch away.

Lord Jesus, Son of God have mercy. I have so often wanted a self-instigated salvation without the mess and grit of desperation. There is only one hero in my story. Have mercy in my desperation, so that I can more fully revel in your rescue.